I've come on holiday by mistake.
We had a bit of snow last night. It's quite lovely out on the pistes, especially higher up. I've been out in it. And I didn't enjoy it.
Hell, it's quite a first-world problem, isn't it, not enjoying your snowboarding holiday very much? But it's a real shame, and I want to try to get to the bottom of it.
First off, I think I'm in a fairly down mood in general at the moment. So I may not be able to put as positive an attitude on as normal. Second, I'm quite lardy and unfit, which definitely isn't helping. Third, I pushed myself too far after a couple of good days and banged myself up a bit, which has made the rest of the week fundamentally more painful even when my boarding is okay.
But, fundamentally, I think this is just the wrong kind of holiday. The few days off I had between Christmas and New Year were clearly exactly what I needed, only more so. An activity holiday -- especially an expensive one, where you don't feel like you're getting value for money unless you get out there every day -- is the opposite of what my brain needs at the moment, I think.
I think I think I would enjoy snowboarding if in the right body and the right frame of mind. But it's becoming clearer by the day that there's nothing much I can do right now to make this time around more enjoyable.
Meh.
The cures for all this, unfortunately, are only things I can do between now and the next boarding holiday -- get fitter, take some relaxing holidays instead of the big group activity things, and generally take some more time to myself.
What I would love right now is a few weeks off work where I had some time and space to sort my head out. It's difficult to do that when you're travelling at 35mph1 on a plank of wood down the side of a mountain...
Anyway. I'm now in the chalet listening to the 5-star selection on my iPod and trying to cheer up a bit. And Alice's Restaurant has just rolled around, which I'm sure will help!
1I borrowed Scott's GPS on the first day, and clocked up 35.9 mph on a fairly gentle run; scary to think I snowboard faster than I normally drive...
I can feel that it's in some ways frustrating to have come to this realization, but you're being honest and not trying to edge yourself into a corner about it. Don't be down on yourself for not fulfilling a perceived "duty" to be grateful to be on holiday. Feeling miserable is always crummy, whether you're at work or not and regardless of how privileged or otherwise your lifestyle is.
Maybe you can spend some of the remaining time planning when you'd be able to go for the kind of holiday you obviously need. If you think about possible dates and stuff, it'll give you something you can then look forward to.
In the meantime: any good photo opportunities in the area??
That did leave me with about 10 days remaining holiday on a biking holiday in the middle of the Alps and unable to ride though, and you know I actually had a pretty decent and relaxing holiday and never felt that it was particularly 'spoiled' or that I missed out too much. We did a little walking (although I had some weirdass vertigo type reaction to the cable cars the one time we tried to go for a proper walk and had to abandon that) and a lot of chilling out, hot tub time, eating nice food and having a relaxing drink and chatting to interesting people. (I did also ride the Swiss Cup Course with a busted arm just to feel that I got some more riding in, which was terrifying but a good tale for the pub *&).
Why not turn it into the holiday you want it to be? Don't feel obliged to board if its not working for you. If what you need right now is a chill out holiday isn't it better to get some chilling out done rather than feel that you must board/ski because you're on an expensive boarding/skiing holiday? Yeah, ok in hindsight you could have chilled out elsewhere more so and for less cost, but isn't it less waste to get something you want out of what you've got than to try to force it to become something that it isn't?
G and I do seem to take a lot of stick from the 'ride ride ride!' types now on our holidays because we will now quite happily say 'nah, don't feel like it today' and spend quite a lot of the holiday doing other things, including just sitting in the chalet/restaurant reading a book. Why not? It's part of what makes it a great holiday for us! There are a lot don't get this though and have to be ignored *&)
Hope you enjoy the rest of your holiday anyway!
I think with any hobby if you are some how feel OBLIGED to do it then it becomes a chore rather than a hobby.
While it is sad you are not well enough to go boarding you are well enough to go and enjoy the environment. You can still head to the tops and take pictures of people and the landscape, enjoy the peace of an area that can be walked with no skiing.
Effectively you have paid to be in an environment that has opportunities, the opportunities you use are entirely up to you. I can remember going somewhere hot and spending the entire day watching movies, it was great !
The art of relaxation is not to worry about not doing stuff. Just do what YOU want to do.